Looking back

In the last year we have packed in so much as a family, moved house, got married, had a baby, Dan has started a new job, I’ve put on the biggest showcase our dance school has ever seen and Charlie is now about to start a new school.

Mad?! Er…. yes probably! 

It’s only days like today where I’m in front with my admin, the washing is on and Sofia is napping, that you stop. Take stock. Realise how far you’ve come. 

With Charlie finishing infant school in a couple of weeks and all his transition days happening this week I’ve really been reflecting, looking back, and seeing how far he has come.

This photo is one of my favourites of my bear. Taken at my very good friends dance school where he was sat watching with cucumber and crisps (not much changes there :0) )

I feel like those big blue eyes could tell us so much… Charlie didn’t talk fully until he was in infant school. He could say just a few words at 2 years old (and those were ones that only really mummy and daddy could understand). 

It was tough getting a diagnosis of Autism at 3 years old. You feel lost, isolated, angry, sad and this lasts for a long time and comes in waves…. just when you think you are coping, something triggers that mixed bag of emotion again. 

But you know what? I’m SO glad I didn’t let that emotion overtake me…. I often used it to fuel my drive to do what’s right by Charlie, give him every intervention you could think of, get him help and support at school, support others around me to understand him. 

I guess I accepted what we were told by doctors but didn’t let it define us and most certainly Charlie. 

Don’t get me wrong, this comes at a price. Some friends, family and people who you thought would stick around, become distant. Your life HAS to change to best support your child. Your idea of what you think those early years will look like has to change, adapt and be tailored to your child’s needs. 

I channelled everything I had into doing the best I could for Charlie. The discussions, visual timetables, therapies, sleepless nights just to deal with things that other kids do in the blink of an eye. 

I owe so much to people around me that truly get it. The ones that have been there through thick and thin. Your love and support is what has kept me sane!

And now here we are with a new adventure about to begin. Charlie is a remarkable little boy. Proud doesn’t seem to be a big enough word to do justice to him. I’m so thrilled he has tackled every challenge with determination and the biggest heart.

I’m sure we will have many challenges to come – that’s part of growing up for us all hey? 

I know now that no matter what, we can tackle anything! 
Jane xx 


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