I haven’t blogged in quite a while. I’ve sat down so many times to start writing but sometimes it’s hard to know where to start.
I want to share the amazing progress we as a family are making, or share when a day or week is particularly tough. Other times I want to share about specific events that I feel may help others in my shoes. But when it comes to it I almost feel there’s too much to share so I just don’t say anything at all! Then I wonder is it even worth it? Do people even want to read it? Is it useful, interesting or just plain boring!
Because after all, I’m simply sharing how we do things, my stance on a topic, my way of approaching things, who knows if that’s the right way, I’m not sure – all I know is it’s my way.
A big lesson for me recently has been a simple one but one that has made a huge impact.
“Listen to your gut, ”
By all means listen to others , take on feedback, encourage others to share advice and opinion but ultimately I have to do it
My families way,
A way in which it works for my children,
a way in which their needs are supported
a way in which their strengths are built on.
Once I had this realisation recently I feel like I’ve taken 5 steps forward when up until that point I felt like every step forward was followed by twice as many back.
When your sleep deprived (our youngest hasn’t slept through the night for well over a year now) and sometimes anxious and feeling overwhelmed – it’s so easy to start to feel like you lack in self belief, you lose your confidence and you feel like you become resigned to the fact that things will stay as they are.
I have felt knocked down by several appointments with professionals, people fob you off, don’t turn up, talk at you, have no true understanding of what it’s like to have two children with differing additional needs, and this leaves you feeling at best fed up and at worst completely overwhelmed and feeling like you don’t know where to turn.
But my two beautiful kids are what make me drag myself out of that downward spiral – they need me to have 100% conviction, they need me to trust my gut instinct to know what’s right for them, they need me to have self belief, they need me to fight for them, to be their cheerleader.
They are both doing so well, and have come so far in their own ways.
They each have their challenges that require our support, love, patience and care. They both have daily wins, things we must coach them through, to celebrate every bit of progress.
I need to trust in my own capability, trust my instinct and do what’s right by them.
Becoming suffocated by negativity, downward spirally confidence and no conviction when making a decision – neither the kids or myself will benefit.
Just in a couple of days since realising that I’d lost sight of that driven, motivated and confident mum that knew what was right for my kids, I can feel things starting to turn around.
I’m seeing things start to progress with them that had become ‘stuck’ or tough to deal with. That I’d felt I wasn’t supporting them in the right way with.
I’m trying to be kinder to myself in the process, but this is tough. I guess that’s another whole blog post of its own…..
But suffice to say,
All I know now is that actually – just listen to your gut, let that guide you.
Then I know I’ve done the best I can….
I did it….. my way….
PS how many people read that with the tune of Frank Sinatra playing in your head :0)