I probably do make decisions that others find hard to understand.
I probably do over analyse everything, especially things to do with my son.
I probably approach things with more anxiety, caution and sensitivity.
I never thought Charlie would speak like other kids, understand emotion, make friends, be independent, be able to play games and join mummy’s dance class.
When you get a diagnosis of autism it’s scary, upsetting, you’re stepping into the unknown, and you’re told things and read and research things that leave a lump in your throat and a knot in your stomach.
Hearing your child say I love you is a thing most parents take for granted. Charlie learnt to speak using echolalia – learnt phrases or echoed speech (copying his favourite TV programmes, copying others around him) so until very recently Charlie would only ever echo me if I said this to him. To hear him say “I love you” without prompting makes me want to cry my eyes out!
For me, intensely working with Charlie and helping every area of his development is key to giving him the best start in life.
Its hard at times, it’s repetitive, he has taught me about patience, being calm and appreciating the little things in life that we so often take for granted but are such a big achievement.
So for now my decisions may not make sense to everyone but they are right for us, right now, at the time of Charlies life that is so key.